


Pictures in Time

by safely_home



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Character Death, Death, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt Tony Stark, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Iron Man - Freeform, IronDad and SpiderSon, Irondad, Parent Tony Stark, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, spiderman - Freeform, spiderson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:46:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23305531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/safely_home/pseuds/safely_home
Summary: After Tony comes back to earth, he visits the Parkers' apartment.  Sees the way it was left, its tenants unaware that they would never return.
Relationships: May Parker (Spider-Man) & Peter Parker, May Parker (Spider-Man) & Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 12
Kudos: 57





	Pictures in Time

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: This piece deals with grief and dealing with the loss of loved ones.

A month after leaving Earth to chase a donut spaceship, Tony finds himself in front of an apartment building in Queens.

A slight breeze tickles his skin, the normally-quiet neighborhood even more so with half its residents gone. There’s a swirling pit of grief in his chest – has been ever since his call to Pepper on the ship got disconnected. The thing is, back then it was relatively small from the amount of panic looming over it. The panic’s long gone now; the grief bigger than it’s ever been.

In the small front lobby, there’s a middle-aged man coming down the stairs carrying several stacked boxes. He nearly trips on the last step, and Tony’s close enough to move forward and steady him.

“Shoot! Thanks, nearly lost the Cervesas’ porcelain…” the man trails off when he sees who’s behind the boxes. “Tony Stark.” His eyebrows are raised into his forehead crease.

He can’t meet the man’s eyes. Usually when he gets recognized he makes some sort of quip or acknowledgement, but not now. Failure tends to leave you with no self-pride.

“Are you the landlord?”

The guy is blank for a second, then composes himself. “Yeah, yeah. What’re you doing here?” He places the boxes on the floor and leans against the wall.

“I’m a friend of the Parkers.”

“Ah. Wow. You know they, uh, they’re not-“

“Yeah.” Quietly. “Can you lend me the key to their place?”

The landlord peers at Tony. “Friend or not, that’s private property.”

Now Tony looks at him. “What about their stuff? Have you already moved it out? That seems like an invasion of property to me.”

The guy has dark bags under his eyes, a slump to his shoulders and muted eyes. Tony wonders how many tenants no longer live here; how many of his own family are gone. “Look, I can’t let you walk around up there.” 

“Please. I just need to…feel like I’m with them. Somehow.” The vulnerability, especially among strangers, is rare. But these are different times; everyone’s feeling the same kind of loss.

The landlord stares at Tony questioningly, then sighs and walks behind the reception counter. “I haven’t gotten to theirs yet, kind of reluctant to. They didn’t have any emergency contacts listed, so I was gonna have everything cleared out by next week.”

“Maybe I could…take it off your hands. Clearing their stuff.”

He stares again. “No offense, but…why? Who were you to the Parkers? They were some nice people.”

_Who was I? Not good enough, clearly. I tried to be, for you, Peter. Tried to be trustworthy for May._

He clears his throat. “Peter was one of my interns. We worked on engineering, physics. He was a…good kid.”

“Great kid. Always said hi whenever he walked through here. Always had the energy. Hella smart, too. The only kid in this building attending a STEM school. No wonder he was in your internship.”

Tony knows all this and more. “Yeah,” he swallows.

“Did you know about his uncle?”

He nods. Peter didn’t talk about Ben often, but when he did it was with a nostalgia for the man and their memories.

“Yeah. I guess it was a good thing you came along then, right?”

“I hope he thought so,” Tony says hoarsely. “I wasn’t trying to replace his uncle.”

“No, but it was good he had another guy to look up to. And hell, I guess if there was anyone else for him to look up to, it was you,” he gestures. “With all the science and superhero stuff. Used to wear all the merchandise when he was younger.”

The swirling pit is getting bigger. Tony looks at the ground.

“Here.”

He looks up, a little surprised, and takes the key from the landlord. “Did you…do you have any kids?”

The landlord is solemn. “No. Me and my wife…it just wasn’t for us. More about our jobs, I guess.”

“Yeah.” Tony knows a thing or two about that; working is in his blood at this point. But he wishes he had put aside more time for Peter than just one afternoon a week and a couple of weekend visits.

“Elevator’s not in order, and my regular guy isn’t- there’s no one to fix it.”

“Stairs are fine,” he croaks. Gives the guy a nod, which is returned in earnest.

Then he makes his way up to the apartment.

~

He’s only been here once before, when he recruited the kid for his Germany shenanigans. Thinking about that day just leaves him with icy guilt and the wish that he’d never tracked Spider-Man down in the first place. If he hadn’t, maybe the snap wouldn’t have selected Peter’s fate.

_It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all._

The mantra keeps repeating itself in Tony’s mind, no matter how much he wants it gone. Because his own selfishness is telling him that although he shouldn’t have met Peter Parker, he’s glad he did. He was a most unexpected, but needed, beacon of light in his life.

After slowly opening the apartment door, the hallway that leads to the main rooms greets Tony in subdued mockery: the hallway is filled with framed photographs of people that should be alive and well. He doesn’t even remember them being there before.

Tony sees wedding pictures of both Peter’s parents and his aunt and uncle. A selfie of May and her nephew. A newborn baby.

There’s one of Ben, May and Peter at his 8th grade graduation. It’s shocking how different Peter looks. To Tony, he’s only ever appeared muscly and fit under his clothes. But two years before the spider bite and the kid leaves a lot of space in his suit. His skin looks paler and thin circular glasses sit on the bridge of his nose.

Another photo features Ben teaching a 5-year-old Peter to fly a kite in Central Park. Peter is running in his puffy coat with the handle in his hand, the string attached to a kite out of view, and Ben is catching up while probably shouting encouragement. A picture next to it is of the same day - a younger May is hugging the little boy, pointing for him to smile for the camera, and his mouth is upturned shyly. Another of all the Parkers – Peter hugging his mother in her arms, his father looking on proudly, while Ben and May stand beside them. Everyone grins – truly, explicitly happy.

Tony moves on before the lump in his throat gets any bigger.

Beyond the foyer, its eerie in the apartment. Not even the fridge hums. Nothing’s been touched for a month – the kettle sits on the stove, dishes stand in the dish-rack, a book is left open on the coffee table. A layer of dust rests on each item, completely still. The air is stale from the lack of airflow and life.

Tony crosses the living room and opens up some windows. The fact that the familiar sound of horns honking in the distance does not greet him makes his mood even more low.

It almost feels wrong, him being in here. Like he’s seriously invading the Parkers’ privacy or doing something sneaky. Like they could walk in here at any moment.

_“Oh, hey, Mr. Stark. Uh…what’re you doing here?”_

_“Relax, young buck, just doing an inventory sweep.”_

_“Inventory sweep, ha. Count all of May’s books, that’ll take a while.”_

May does have a lot of books. But that just proves what a knowledgeable woman she is.

Was.

~

He doesn’t go into May’s room. Obviously doesn’t go into the bathroom. But he does know where Peter’s room is.

A small beam of light from the window shines on Tony when he creaks the door open. It’s different from the last time he saw it – a bunk bed has replaced the twin, shelves are lined with books and figurines, and a Mets pennant flag is tacked to the wall. Two desks have been pressed together for more surface space, an academic decathlon flyer hanging adjacent to them.

The bed is the way Peter left it – the sheets are tousled up and the plaid comforter has been pushed against the wall. It haunts Tony that Peter woke up that morning not knowing he’d be in space by noon; hell, on a different planet by dinner.

His eyes drift across the desks, taking in their contents: a chess set (with an unfinished game on the board), circuit boards, an old boxy computer, various tools for electronics, a magnifying stand, and a LEGO spaceship model. The view makes him smile.

But the smile doesn’t last for long, because the chess game will never have a winner. The computer will never be finished, and no more LEGO sets will ever be added to the collection.

The swirling pit has gotten alarmingly big now, and he’s hardly been in the apartment five minutes. He’s about to turn, but then a flash of hot-rod red catches his eye. It’s behind the academic decathlon flyer. Out of reluctance, Tony gingerly lifts the flyer to reveal…

…himself.

Well, him in his Mark VII armor, with a hand reached out as if to blast something coming his way. To his left, Thor stands heroically, with Cap, Nat, Clint and the Hulk all posing seriously behind him. Stark Tower and several sky-rises depict a landscape of war, the beam from Loki’s staff shooting up into the sky. At the bottom reads _The Avengers_ , written in big block letters.

It’s a popular victory poster done by a local graphic design artist that sold to the masses after the battle of New York. They’re all made to look heroic, as if it was only a matter of time before they pulverized the Chitauri. In reality, they were all scared out of their wits that the city really would be doomed.

The poster both prides and nauseates Tony. That world was gone, now. A world where the biggest threat only posed on one of the most-populated cities in the world. Scratch that six years later: now it’s the whole universe.

Has Peter had this poster up all this time? Basking in the belief from a young age that these people would be able to save him if ever again there came a day? 

Well they didn’t. He didn’t. Wasn’t able to.

He drags a ragged breath, but then the room is much smaller and the walls are closing in on him. _Clear your head, exhale._ He can hardly see due to the sudden film of liquid sitting over his eyes. He blinks and it trails down his cheeks slowly.

Have to get out of here.

He turns to the door, but then there’s a glint in his eye from the beam of sunlight hitting a glass picture frame. He picks it up off the dresser, blinks a bit, and the image becomes clear. The memory of that day plays like a vintage film reel in his head:

~

_Tony, Pepper and Peter are in the Avengers Tower lobby, in front of the Stark Industries plaque. The sun shines through the huge glass windows, making the whole room feel warm and mellow._

_Tony watches as Peter combs his hair back in the small mirror Pepper holds up. There are locks that never stay in place, yet he tackles them anyway, willing for them not to stick out. It’s in the back of his mind, but Tony’s always liked that Peter’s hair is a little wavy. He’d seem like a different person without the occasional curls._

_Pepper looks over and gives Tony a smug smile. After months, she was the one to finally set up a day to take an alibi photo. It’s a good idea; this way Peter will have something to show people if they ever question his true association with Iron Man. And maybe now Peter will prove that little punk Flash wrong._

_It’s not just about having an alibi photo though; after the plane crash, Tony set up real internship time with Peter for Tuesdays after school. He’s done phenomenally – absorbing advanced concepts in stride and creating new tech for his suit and even Tony’s gadgets. He deserves to feel rewarded, even if it’s just with a certificate and takeout dinner upstairs later._

_He grins back, the glint in his eye unbeknownst to him. There’s a certain energy in the air, and he’s sure everyone can feel it. But now it’s time to tease._

_“C’mon Pete, this should take less than a minute. Those circuit boards aren’t going to fix themselves,” he chides._

_“Mr. Stark, you of all men should understand taking the time to look good. Besides, if we’re dressing nicely then my hair should look put-together too,” Peter justifies. His eyes dart back and forth in the mirror._

_“Ignore him,” Pepper says, rolling her eyes. “Spend time on your hair. Besides, he’s always rushing others, even though he’s typically the one running late.”_

_“Hey!”_

_“Okay, that’s probably good enough.” Peter takes a quick final look, then goes and stands next to Tony. Tony pulls the framed certificate from behind his back._

_“Nice.” Peter’s wearing his tight-lipped smile._

_“Okay, stand closer together, you two. You’re presenting this to him, Tony,” Pepper directs, holding up the camera._

_“Yes, yes, I’m getting in character. Loosen up, kid, you’re supposed to be excited.”_

_“I am excited, Mr. Stark. It’s good that we’re doing this.” He rolls his shoulders back a bit and straightens his mustard-brown blazer._

_Hmm._

_Pepper takes a picture, then fiddles with the dials on the DSLR. Tony turns to give the kid his full attention. “Hey. You okay?”_

_Peter’s eyes narrow a little in misunderstanding. “Yeah, why do you ask?”_

_He sighs. “Listen, we’re not just doing this for an alibi. You’ve done well, Pete. I’m impressed with how far you’ve come. You deserve some recognition.”_

_“Be proud of yourself, Peter,” Pepper adds._

_Now his crinkly smile is showing. “Thanks, Mr. Stark.”_

_“Of course. You are the only intern I have, after all. Gotta let that sink in.”_

_“I mean, that’s kind of just because of Spider-Man,” Peter says with a little shrug._

_Tony puts a hand on his shoulder. “Not anymore.” Peter grins, and there's happiness inside Tony's chest. He turns back towards Pepper, an arm around Pete’s shoulder._

_“Aright Pepper, all warmed up.”_

_As she’s counting down, Tony senses Peter move his arm right before the flash. In a second he figures it out, and puts a peace sign behind Peter’s head._

_Click!_

_“Bunny ears, interesting choice,” he jests._

_“I thought I was being subtle.”_

_“Not with me, kid.”_

~

The swirling hurricane has climaxed, and the rain starts to fall. He can no longer contain it: the grief, the quiet, choked sobs that have been building in his gut push out of him uncontrollably. He sits on the edge of Peter’s bed, shoulders racking as he clutches the frame. A few tears fall onto the glass, landing right over Peter’s face.

“I’m sorry, kid. I’m sorry." 

~

The next day Tony goes back to the apartment with Happy to get Peter and May’s stuff. They pile their personal items and clothes into cardboard boxes, labelling them _Parker_ with black sharpies. May’s books take up the majority of them.

When they return to the compound, they take the boxes to the storage area in Tony private locker and place them near the back. Take one last look, turn off the light, and close the door.

When Tony and Pepper move to their new cabin upstate a few weeks later, Tony takes only one of Peter’s items with him.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading :)


End file.
